May 2013
3 posts
19 tags
and once again... he has a girlfriend.
I can’t. I honestly… I just don’t…. AGAIN? Lets back this up for a second.
About 10 days ago, I went on a trip to Vegas, it’s a long story as to how and why I was there, but lets suffice to say I had a suite at a bangin’ hotel all to myself. Lets also suffice to say that I’ve been extremely lonely lately and a gigantic hotel suite all by lonesome was...
9 tags
on sleeping in his hoodie
He left his hoodie here again. Not his favorite one this time, the one I picked out for him that just fits his style in such a way, that it really made me sad to think of him without it. He swapped it out for an older, inexpensive number that his mother or sister or ex-girlfriend probably got him somewhere along the line. It’s been here so long that I had to wash it, but I can still smell...
9 tags
on sleeping with male friends
When I was first venturing into the world of love, sex and dating, someone once told me to heed the age old metaphor, “Don’t shit where you eat.” Perhaps this explains how I spent most of high school and college in an intimacy deprived, academic and alcohol fueled haze. I was desperate for physical intimacy, but felt trapped in a world of male friends with no romantic...
March 2013
1 post
16 tags
don't you tell her how i give you something that...
Just when I think it’s become a silly joke between us and we’re destined to carry on with funny Facebook chats and the occasional text, it happens again. I hadn’t seen Stubble since the last time I mentioned him, we’d talked here and there but obviously he was a little preoccupied with his actual relationship and the new job that he started not long after we had our last...
January 2013
2 posts
8 tags
2013
at 6am on new year’s eve i told you i fought for you. you said you were flattered & unworthy, but so glad to know me. i said i was glad to know you too, even when you make me crazy. you said the crazy isn’t what you’re afraid of… it’s everything else.
stop being afraid.
11 tags
just friends.
I’ve always had a very bizarre relationship with the opposite sex. Whether it’s a side effect of seeking approval or just some weird underlying daddy issue, I constantly am attracted to male friendships over female ones, which in my personal life has probably lead to more friends with benefits type situation than I’m proud of. In fact it’s been a bit of a surprise that over...
November 2012
2 posts
8 tags
but bear this in mind, it was meant to be...
The way you look at me is terrifying. It’s like you see me in a way that no one else ever will. Your honesty is disarming and the trust you have with me in all situations is flattering to say the least. While our physical encounters are limited to one, I would say that we’re more intimate than most. It’s obvious in the way you fold your body over mine and hold me a little longer...
7 tags
if i didn't know better...
stop saying those sweet things you know i’d like to hear…
The moment Stubble opened his mouth I knew we would end up falling into bed before the night was over. It hasn’t happened many times, but when it does, the feeling is undeniable. Mutual friends introduced us outside a bar, early in the evening, and we were almost inseparable from that point on. We talked for hours as...
July 2012
1 post
8 tags
the crumbling difference between wrong & right
Things are better these days. You make me smile again and I’ve begun to lose sight of how much I miss the nights when you used to cuddle up to me all warm-skinned and stubble-faced. So much has changed in this life of ours, yet at the same time so little. I feel it in the way I still get sad that it is always her over me, and the way that I’ll always be the reliable one, here taking...
June 2012
1 post
8 tags
Lying is the most fun a girl can have without...
… but it’s better if you do.
When you don’t even trust yourself, it’s impossible to trust anyone else in your life. I feel like a mental patient because I’ve become so untrusting of everyone around me that I literally make myself hysterical. Most of them have not given me reasons not to trust them, but my own poor judgement and dishonesty is enough to make me believe...
April 2012
1 post
5 tags
do you remember...
that hot day in early September when we rode the 6 all the way into the bronx, deeper than i’d ever been, and you played me your beats on your Beats while i smiled and bobbed my head. we spent all afternoon getting high and watching Pirates of the Caribbean and Star Wars on the commercial breaks. then we had sex in a bed that didn’t belong to us and ate pizza until we couldn’t...
March 2012
1 post
8 tags
That Boy is Dangerous.
It was never supposed to be like this with him. He was supposed to be simple, a friend, a brother, mainly just someone entirely non-sexual. I barely even took notice of him the night we met, immediately dismissing him as bland. The second night we met things seemed more normal, we were both drunk and talkative, we spoke of a mutual love of photography and music. But that third night, he walked...
January 2012
2 posts
6 tags
3 years
When the Bouncer of our neighborhood dive bar, started chatting me up a couple weeks ago, it wasn’t that weird. I know he is a friend of my Baby Bro since they’re both fixed gear riders, and I’ve certainly been to the bar enough times both with BB and other friends. The Bouncer is also not your typical bouncer, nor is he your typical fixie boy, but rather something in between....
12 tags
I'm just a girl who can't say no...
It’s quite obviously winter these days, but I can’t seem to shake Summer Fling. It’s harder to go cold turkey with him than everyone else because he’s my protector in a way. When things go horribly wrong, more often then not I end up sitting on the edge of his bed, crying and sniffling until my tears are all dried up, not that shocking when you consider I spent as many...
December 2011
3 posts
11 tags
To fuck or not to fuck... that is the question!
One of my current jobs is in retail and as a tried and true lifer at my brand (Yipee!), I often get sent out to help visual merchandise at stores undergoing re-models or having special corporate visits. Last week I got farmed practically out of the five boroughs to help get things ship-shape after a re-model. That’s where I met Swag.
I was crouching down to get something out of my bag,...
8 tags
Just a thought...
… but if I’m cuter than your girlfriend, we have better sex than you and your girlfriend, and you all around like hanging out with me, why am I not your girlfriend?
It’s after midnight and my phone just rang. It was the Bartender. He wasn’t drunk, but in the neighborhood and wanted to know what I was up to i.e. come over and make-a the sexytime. I told him it wasn’t...
8 tags
They'll tightly wrap you round their finger...
…and brag about it to their friends, it’s nothing but a game to them.
Why do we as ladies feel the need to constantly string guys along long after the relationship has run its course? Now I’m not saying that no man has ever strung a woman along, they certainly have, but usually it gets to a point where either the man moves their attention onto someone they’re more...
November 2011
1 post
7 tags
I'm Seeing Someone...
A very funny comedian friend once told this great joke about how 20 & 30-somethings in NYC love to say they’re seeing someone, but by seeing they actually mean fucking. The joke has stuck with me for a while now and recently I came to the horrifying realization that I’m seeing someone.
I met Long Island at a bar, it was 2am and I was drunk off tall boys of Miller High Life and...
